Sugar and Spice... {thoughts on having a tomboy}

My little love has such a range of emotions.  And they all are expressed so perfectly on her sweet, soft face.

One moment she is all sugar... and the next moment - SPICE!

And while I have yet to capture it on camera, she is often caught giving an evil glare to someone she's not sure about.  Her eyes squint - one slightly more than the other - and she tilts her chin down and stares up at the perpetrator.  And everyone cracks up laughing.  Guess her look needs some fine tuning if she expects it to scare people away.  I'll help her perfect it before she starts dating - that's for sure.

But something in me craves to have a girly-girl.  To paint our nails together.  Go shopping.  Do all things GIRL.  And this in-between, not knowing if she is or not, is killing me.  I've turned into a motherly Sherlock Holmes - trying to decipher every move of hers for clues on her personality.

There are times that she shows her feminine, motherly, nurturing side.  And then she gets bored and hops on a four-wheeler.

Perhaps it is because she is surrounded by her brother's toys.  And there is nothing more appealing to her than Thomas the Train.  Or a good 'ol Superhero.

Or climbing up on the tallest rock.

Despite my "training", she is refusing the wear any headband or clip-on bow. {And she finally has enough hair to clip!}  Is this her trying to tell me that she wants nothing to do with dresses and all things frilly?

What about the time that she twirled and hopped in her tutu as my heart leaped with joy?  This girl is sending mixed messages.

Why is having a tomboy so scary to me?  Would it really be that bad?

I decide it won't.  Because she will still be my sweet little girl.  The one that I will embrace and love no matter what her preferences in extra-curricular activities are.

Because it doesn't matter if it's ballet class or soccer games.  I care more about what her heart loves.  And I want it to love Jesus.  I want that to define her. 

 

Sweet Dreams, my love.

I'm learning to love the night time.  I'm learning to slow down as I tuck him in.  I've been told by a few weathered mothers that the traditional "tuck-in time" should not be rushed as those can be the moments of tremendous growth and times of heart to hearts.

So, I'm practicing.  And while most of our chats in the twinkle-lighted room are still about Superheroes and Yo Gabba Gabba, I know that I'm starting to pave way for an open space of truth.  A place where fears can be shared and moments relived.

I snuggle up to him and he asks, Want to go night-night on my bed, momma?  

I resist that anxious feeling of freedom that lingers beyond his closed door.  The time I get from 8pm - 11pm all to myself.  These, right here, are the moments that I won't have forever.  The snuggle times.  The wide-eyed questions.  I'm dreading the day that I'm not even allowed in his room.

So, I stay.  I snuggle.  I chat about the day.  He tells me about his favorite movie.

Then asks me a question - like a full blown adult.  He asks what my favorite movie is.  And I smile because we are getting to know each other.

 

Sharing this post here:

What I Want my Kids to Remember {perseverance}

Sometimes the tasks you choose to attempt seem impossible to me.  Sometimes the task doesn't make much sense.

But this is what you want.  And you are determined to finish it.

But I love that you ask for help.  Always know that it's ok.  We are all made to need each other.  Needing each other is not a sign of weakness.

Because one way or another, you always seem to finish what you set out to do.

This image has been entered into the 12 Days of Mommy Moments {Day/Prompt #10}

And your sense of pride and accomplishment are pure joy to witness. 

Keep on keeping on Little Love.  You want to put that hanger in your shirt while you're still in it?  I'm behind you all the way.  No telling you that's silly.  I want to help you embrace your feats.  To climb to the tops of the mountains {or the dining room chair}.  To swim across oceans {or get your hair wet in the bathtub}. 

This momma is here to help you become and do what you were created to do.  Let's roll!  {or hang?}

Linking to:

Finally... peace.

It started as soon as he woke up.  I rolled out of bed, hair a mess, into his room.

"Mommy, can I watch a movie?"  We stumble into the living room and turn on cartoons.

"NO!  Not that movie!!"  I change the channel until I realize that nothing is satisfying this little monster.

"I want to eeeeeaaaat."  But he doesn't know what he wants.  And everything I set in front of him is wrong.

"I want Mac & Cheese."  For breakfast?  I don't care.  I make it.  I set it before his Royal Highness and he says,

"Noooo... I don't waaannnt Mac & Cheese."

She's up now.  Eats her breakfast like a little champ.  {The floor, however, is still covered in her food - hours later}.

He's back at it:  "I want to go the Y and play with the toys and the kids."  Great!  I'd love to work out and have a small break from being a mom.  I start to get everyone dressed.  We walk toward the door.

"I don't want to go to the Y.  I want to stay at my hoouuuse and take a nap."  The longer I pull him toward the door, the harder he fights me and the louder he whines.

A nap?  That would be fine, too.  Little one would just scream the entire time I worked out anyway.  So shoes come off.

The nap lasted 10 minutes.  "Mommy???"  I walk in the room.   "I'm awake!"  Great.  Let's play outside.  {This pseudo-nap happened three times}.

"I want to play with the rice!"  I decide to bring down the beans.  Horror erupts when he finds out that beans have entered his playtime rather than the rice.  He eventually gets over it.  

I remember tomorrow is St. Patrick's Day.  I need to take my annual holiday picture for the blog.  I don't have a backdrop prepared for it and the kids are in no mood to smile.

I decide to make this and let them at in in the bathtub.  It was a success.

Then lunch came.

"I want pizza!!"  I hand him a leftover slice from yesterday.

"Noooooo!!  I don't waaaaant pizza."  Chicken nuggets?  Maybe he'll like to dip those.  He accepts until the plate gets in front of him.

"I don't wannnnt chicken nuggets.  I wanna go night-night."  Ok, let's go.  Halfway to his room.

"I wanna eeeeaaaaat chicken nuggets first!!"  Back in the chair.

I walk out of the room at the request to get his sippy cup.  And I catch a glance of myself in the mirror.  Baggy grey sweatpants wet around the bottom, dirty white tank top that does nothing for holding in my c-section gut.  Hair a mess and a face that hasn't seen makeup in days.

I start crying.  I've given up everything for these kids.  I've given up my freedom, my "me-time", my career, my body.

I can't do it anymore.  But I can't NOT do it.  Where do I go from here?

Somehow we make it through lunch.  And this time he really does go to sleep.  I tuck him in and he whispers, "I love YOU, Mommy."  Heart melts.

I carry her into her room and sway back and forth as her little head drops to my chest.  I smell her hair and think that everything must be right.

Naptime brings a breath of perspective, doesn't it?

Documenting Their Growth with Canvas Handprints

I absolutely love traditions.  And I absolutely love documenting my children and their growth.  This next project marries to two together.  

Every January I take a new handprint of my children and display in on the wall.  One row for my son, one row for my daughter (added in 2011).

I foresee it becoming even bigger as we add more members to our family, and it's so simple to make.  Here's everything you need:

I purposely don't stamp their hands onto the canvas because there is no room for error.  I instead, stamp their hand on a white sheet of paper until I like how it looks, then cut around it and mod podge it to the canvas.

Such a simple project with lots of fun decor possibilities.  And what kid doesn't like stamping their hand??

PS - don't forget to check out my NEW website!  And remember, for a short time, get double the Reward Points by mentioning that you read my blog in the checkout process!

Linking up to Best DIY Projects by Beneath My Heart

Guest Post: {I'm Givin' it Up!} from Lindsay at EllenJay's

Details on the Pinterest Challenge will be posted later today.

Until then, sit back and be encouraged by our  

Guest Poster, Lindsay from EllenJay's 

as she talks about something we all can relate to.

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Today I’m going to write about something that I’ve really been struggling with lately. It’s something that all moms go through, it’s unavoidable, and it’s horrible. Are you ready for it? You sure?

 {Drumroll please….}: mommy guilt.

 Just saying it makes me cringe a little. As a first-time mom to an almost 14-month old, this whole guilt thing is totally new to me. But I’m pretty sure that it’s never going to leave. I’m pretty sure because I know that my mom still suffers from mommy guilt and I’m almost 28.

So then, how do we handle it? Logically I know that guilt is not from God, but emotionally, it tears me up inside. I try to write it off, let it roll off my back, brush it under the rug….but it still lingers. 

 The first time it happened was when the Bug {that’s my daughter…should I feel guilty that we call her the Bug? Like she’s the only one?} was about 6 months old. I had been desperately looking for a decent-paying part-time job and had pretty much given up, so I applied for a full-time job with the company I was working for at the time. During the week or two that I was interviewing for, thinking about, and praying over the job, Miss Bug was cutting two teeth and dealing with the side effects of too many vaccinations at once. No one was sleeping. Not even our dog. I remember driving over to my mom’s house one day and thinking, “Gosh, it would be nice to work full-time and not have to deal with any of this!” And in that moment, I was tempted to take the job and leave my baby in daycare.

And then it hit me. Like a cold slap in the face. I thought, “What kind of mother wants to leave her child in daycare because they’re being difficult or fussy? For a job she knows she doesn’t want or need?” My guilt here wasn’t stemming from wanting a full-time job; my guilt came from being willing to pawn my miserable child off on someone else so that I wouldn’t have to deal with her.  Even though I didn’t actually follow through with it, I felt guilty for even thinking about abandoning my baby in her time of need. 

 Now that the Bug’s a toddler, we’re entering into a completely new phase: discipline. And let me be completely honest: I HATE it. Even though I’m doing it for her benefit, I still hate it. Last week I had to flick her because she kept grabbing a steak knife out of the dishwasher. And she just looked so shocked. So hurt. So startled that her mommy, the one who has always fed, loved, and nurtured her, could also be someone who would inflict pain upon her. It was horrible. I did it to keep her safe, but I still felt guilty.

And sometimes, at the end of the day, I’m just tired and impatient. And I snap at her or speak to her in a way that isn’t always kind. Especially when she tries to stand up in her high chair. For the tenth time. As soon as the words leave my mouth, I feel this twinge of guilt.

I’m not sure how to handle it. Because I’m not perfect and I’m going to make mistakes in my parenting. 

 For starters, I really try not to dwell on it. If a guilty thought pops into my mind, I begin meditating on 2 Cornithians 10:5 {…and we take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ}. I know that guilt is not from Christ. Condemnation is not from Christ. Conviction is from Christ, and guilt and conviction are not the same thing.

And I’ve also been praying more; praying that God would give me wisdom and discernment in my parenting, praying that God would help me to be quick to think and slow to react, and praying that God would give me the tools to show unconditional love to my child, whether she’s happy, sad, sick, teething, feverish, or joyfully giddy.

And lastly, I know that I need to extend the same grace to myself that I extend to other moms when they’re struggling with the same thing {easier said than done, right?}. I need to not be so hard on myself. Because the truth it that no matter what mistakes I make with the Bug, my love for her runs deep and is unconditional. No amount of guilt is going to take that truth away, but what it will do is rob me of the joy that I find in mothering her, loving her, learning with her, and watching her grow. And that is something that I refuse to give up in return for something as horrible as guilt. 

Will you join me in giving up the guilt? I hope so! Let’s let go of the guilt and enjoy our children today! 

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I don't relate to this or anything... ha.

Remember when I confessed that I left my kids in ChildWatch at the YMCA the other day and felt HAPPY about it?

I had MAJOR mommy-guilt on that one.

Still do.

yikes... this runs deep.

By the way... Lindsay is one of our Pinterest Challenge SPONSORS!

{all of the prize packages and details will be posted later today}

She has donated an incredible prize from her ETSY shop

SpunkyStinkBug

{can anyone guess who her shop might be named after?!}

The Bug did an incredible job modeling your ETSY products, Lindsay!

Go visit her blog and snoop around.
This girl is hilarious!
Especially all her posts on Motherhood.
love.

ditty is 6 months

Time is flying.

My baby girl just turned 6 months old!

We set up a little photo shoot to celebrate the occasion.

Her brother was climbing over me the entire time.

It's amazing I got any clear shots of her.

 This photo shoot was quick and easy otherwise!

See what a simple blanket stuck to a wall with thumb tacks can do for your pictures?

Little Ditty is such a sweet baby.

That smile is pretty much how she looks at all time.

And those cheeks... OH those cheeks.  

I LOVE to kiss them.

Being a Mommy is my ALL TIME favorite.

I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Thank you for allowing me to stay at home with these precious ones by supporting Better Life Bags.

My little ones thank you, too.

Pretty Ditty

It's starting to hit me that I have a DAUGHTER.

A daughter who will most likely struggle through self image issues because of the world we live in today.

I'm feeling wholly unprepared for that stage.

Mostly because I struggle with it, too.

How do I help a precious little one understand her TRUE beauty and her TRUE worth...

when I barely understand it myself?

Remember this guest post by Wendy at Almota Roses Photography?
Well, I reread it today and understood it in a whole new way.
Thanks, Wendy, for your thoughtful insights and beautiful images.

{I'm secretly hoping Ditty has that glorious red hair that your little ones do!}